angst or pure confused?

2009-04-14T21:06:00.000-07:00

2009-04-12T01:14:00.000-07:00

Overdue pictures from a long long long long time ago that I had promised to upload. I finally found the USB cable for my digicam. Har har har :D So yeah.

This is when I had pizza with baby and ashraf :D

This was on Abang's birthday at Fresh Bulgogi :D

This was during the CNY celebrations with our pair class in school :D

This was at Aaqil's pirate-themed party at Costa Sands :D

This was on my sister's birthday :D

And this is of my baby! :D
Okay, i'm done :D

2009-04-10T08:44:00.000-07:00

Happy good friday to all that's celebrating. Indeed, its a very good friday. There's no school and on top of that, i got to go out with baby ^^ hee.

Right. So we went to check out tampines one today. By the way, anyone have any idea why they choose to name it tampines one? Why one? Why not eighteen? (chak puay. Lol inside joke) i don't get why they call lot one that either. Lol. Ended up just people watching because there were too many people flooding the place. And there was an effing long queue outside the japanese streetwear shop. We didn't bother shoving our way pass people so we went to town instead. Baby wanted to get his vans zapato and a rockett clothing shirt. But i guess today's not his lucky day. No sizes for both. Aww, my poor baby. I didn't get myself much. Just a shirt. I still feel guilty about my splurge with jiaying the other day. And besides, my phone bill just came :///

I've got d&t coursework tomorrow and elementary mathematics mock test after that :/ ah, my saturdayyy.

Anywaysss, i love my baby,
Dinno Ramon ^^
And my galpal,
Ong jia ying ^^

Yay, i'm a happy girl :D

2009-04-08T06:42:00.000-07:00

Has anyone seen this boy?
I miss him like fuck.
)))':

2009-04-04T09:32:00.000-07:00

Its almost one now. I just got back from brian's barbeque at his place. I'm tired as fcvk being out the whole day but my brain cells are defying me and refuse to allow my system to shut down. Oh well. Killing time before i eventually do.

So, had d&t in the morning. Made a vanguard model of the artefact and gathered the anthropometric data.

Waited at the bustop with faisyah and zul. 28 came and zul left. Zurikh came and faisyah left. So i was sitting alone at the bustop when i received a text from a number my phone doesn't recognise. It read: "Srg je" which was pretty freaky considering i didn't know who it was from.

Then met jiaying at bedok mrt. (sorry i was late :P) and we headed to far east. She initially changed her mind about going due to the blazing weather but we did anyway. And god answered her prayers and made it rain -_- see la. Complain summore. Lol. Neither of us had umbrellas so we were pretty soaked. Found out that she shops exactly like me :D (which very few people do) we practically made our way to every inch of the mall. I needed retail therapy badly so i splurged today. Eighty over dollars flew out of my wallet. But on the bright side, i don't regret it :)

Then we headed for brian's house and had a barbeque by the poolside. Wee. He even ordered my favourite - stingray! :D realised that everyone went back early. Thought of staying longer than realised we would be the only ones left. Enjoyed the food and friends :)

On the sideline, i realised the value of a friendship today. I realised that i don't need her to convince me for me to believe her. I realised that i could share my thoughts and feelings with her without getting judged or taken lightly. I realised we had more in common that i had first thought. I learnt the hard way that there are only a rare few that you can actually call your bestfriends. Some people just put on a front and pretend to be nice to you. And i know she's not 'some people'. Its great having a friend like you. Anything at all, i'll be here for you. Love you, jia ying ^^

God. I miss dinno so much. If this is a test of time, i'll wait. I keep telling myself not to worry, this is not as bad as when he goes in for national service. But i can't help but feel like something's missing. I miss you, bubu. I need you, badly. I'll see you soon? Xoxo. ): i love you.

TTFN.
Rvx. <3

2009-03-27T03:13:00.000-07:00

good day, earthlings.

First and foremost i'd like to wish my baby a happy ninteenth monthsary :) and i love you to bits and pieces. We've come this far, baby. So what comes our way, i'm sure we'll be able to handle - together. So a few days back, i met baby, who was waiting outside school with danial and fred. Hardy har har. So yeah. Celebrated and shiz.

Didn't turn up for school the following day since i had a consultation. So i spent nearly the whole day reading my new novel from brian freeman, stripped. Its a great thriller with really interesting bits that get you thinking. I'm still in the dark about who commited the sick crimes but i'm gonna read till i find out. Woo hoo.

I'm really drained right now. Had school and shiz. The last two periods was dedicated to earth day. Lol. Since its tomorrow. We had to turn off the lights and air cons and study in the sweltering heat and partial darkness. Lol. I'm not even exaggerating. We are after all located in a metal container in the middle of the field. I then stayed behind for design and technology with shurz'. I'm still developing my product but can-t wait to start on construction. Anyway, then i dilligently went for mother tongue. Which i initially planned to let it slip. Walked home and skew my marshmallows on the kitchen stove. Lol. I'd have to go back to school in a while. For meet the parents session. Zzz.

I need a long, deserving break that i know i'm not gonna get till the bloody O's are over. But heck,i'm just longing for a speck of a chance. :/ hmm.

2009-03-23T07:34:00.000-07:00

Before all else, i'd like to wish my bestest best friend in the whole wide world, ferdaus rashid a really happy birthday. And we'll meet up soon, love :D

Moving on. Things have been happening really quick lately. Like, really really quick. Before i know it, the one week break is already over and we're back behind our plastic desks having to cram things in our brain again. Well, not that it was exactly a "break" per say. I had school every single day of the supposed holidays. Zzz. From D&T coursework to oral consultation to night study etc. School has been draining. Really draining. Well, on the contrary, things at home are getting much better. My brother's in for reservice and my future sister in law is back in thailand till june. Phew.

Had 3 birthday parties during the march holiday week alone. Pictures shall be up when i have the feel. Lol.

Well, i had my smiley done and i love my pink horse shoe to bits. (and no, i don't give two hoots what you think.)

K i'm done.
TTFN, darlings.

You either love me for who i am,
Or don't love me at all.

2009-03-14T10:58:00.000-07:00

Here are photos from Ms Chan's farewell cum end of common test party on friday. Our class ordered pizza and coke and belched our goodbyes. Lol. Kidding. Well, i hope she enjoys her life in SP :)
Jia ying hates this photo but ohwell =P
Had night study on friday too. Just when i thought we could celebrate the end of common tests and bite off the pages of our textbooks in glee. Lol. But a wise man once said, always look on the bright side of things. Haha, and i did - well, at least i got myself two free old chang kee curry o's. Lol. My all time favourite. Ohwell, i better be asleep then. Its 2.30am now. My teacher say that if you sleep after 2, your body won't get a chance to rejuvenate. Chances are, i won't grow tonight =O eek.

Reply to jia ying's post:
I love jae wai too! :D

2009-03-14T10:47:00.000-07:00

Been a really hectic week. Common tests and preparations for my brother's wedding. I passed emath. Lol. I don't know about the rest yet. But i hope they're just as fine. *bites nails* its 2 am right now and i'm just back from the mak andam's house for the costume rental. I'm tired as fvck but i can't even sleep. Baby's in malaysia now so i don't have anyone to crap with this late. All in all, there's pretty much a lot more things the wedding planner has yet to complete. I hope everything turns out alright. After being so worked up and shiz, what a better way to relax and put my mind at ease than getting a manicure from your sister in law to be. Haha.

2009-03-13T07:33:00.001-07:00

No matter how hard a small dick tries to act big,
it will still be a small dick.

2009-03-10T01:42:00.000-07:00

common tests are making me bury myself in heaps of notes, books and files.
what are you doing still reading?
go bury yourself too!
GO GO GO :D

2009-03-09T00:37:00.000-07:00

my eyes have been glued to the screen watching boys before flowers. i know the title doesn't make any sense but its actually a really cool drama series. i've watched till episode 16 and episode 18 is going to be uploaded tonight. Haha. Jia Ying watches this drama toooo so yeah we'll discuss about how evil Jun Pyo's mother is and how nice Ji Hoo is to Jan Di. Bahxszxsz. I wanna watch episodes 17 and 18 ): screw common tests.

just now was my first day back at school. a lot of things have changed since i was gone. to think two weeks could have contributed to that much change. i've got a lot of catching up to do. so much to do, so little time. thank god jia ying taught me chemistry. i wouldn't know what to do without herrrr <3

well, on a less important note, my elder brother is getting married in june. I wanna get married too! hahahaha -.-" lol jk.

I love my dinosaur! :D

2009-03-05T17:16:00.000-08:00

hello there earthlings.

while rotting at home today, i visited jia ying's blog! :D
(adaptation: "school without rvzana is extremely boring!")
lol, i love that guuurl. i'll be back in no time, okay!
and we'll continue to crap about lesbians and frequenting the toilet. haha.
wahaha. i feel so honoured. lol. in fact, i kinda miss school.
haven't been anywhere near school for 10 days already.
i'll be back on monday to suffer the wrath of common tests. -.-

well, aside from that, i shall now unveil my photo journal.
you can visit it by clicking here.
its nothing much at the moment but it'll improve gradually.

that's all loves;
xoxo.

p.s: i miss dinno ):

father?!

2009-03-05T06:02:00.000-08:00

you know what, dad?

gone were the says i looked up to you.
you've tainted my opinions and views about you.

i'm not disappointed because you're telling me what to do and what to do or you're putting me off or all that crap, you know it. i'm disappointed with the fact that you're so biased. fact is fact, as much as you're trying to deny it. ask yourself, what have i done today that disappoints you so much? i barely rubbed shoulders with you for five minutes and you just gotta start blasting me off.

don't fucking blame me for being crude.
look where i got these genes from.
airhead.

2009-03-04T10:21:00.001-08:00

Don't you think society has cast an impossibly huge mould for you to fill in?

Pulse.

2009-03-02T20:11:00.000-08:00

A lot has since changed and happened since i last blogged. I've went through a whole series of emotions and been through tough times while i was on hiatus. So, i've got quite a bit to share with you netizens.

Firstly, i got myself a new phone. A gorgeous black Nokia E66 slide boasting speedy local connectivity. Hence, this device makes it easier for me to blog! And answering to some of your enquiries, i don't see the problem with zhng-ing this too! :D

Secondly, I'm finally back from my week's stay at Changi General Hospital. I'd like to take this opportunity to thank those who have shown care and concern and visited me (: I'd also like to thank the dedicated staff at Ward 17 for taking good care of me. Haha. Speaking of which, I've been missing plenty of school while i was in the hospital. Homework is piling and god knows how many lessons and lectures i've missed. But alas, i'm determined to catch up. ^^

Thirdly, my family's a wreck. Everyone tends to mind their own muddleheaded businesses without caring a hoot what the other family members opinions are. Basically, i'm stuck in the middle. I feel so helpless looking at the state my mum is in. What can i do? I keep asking myself. But it seems that there's nothing more i'm capable of doing besides consoling my worried sick mum. My dad seems so laxed and biased. He even got me to swallow the blame. My brother's the root of all this i guess. If i'm biased enough, i would think that "If he hadn't brought and cohabited with that Thai girl, our family wouldn't be in this mess." But i guess i shouldn't be biased. Everyone's slapped with their own dillema's. Our own problems. But this affair called family, sucks.

Blood is thicker than water? I keep questioning myself of the rationale of that claim. However, I'm glad that there are friends I can depend and rely on and can run to them whenever i'm in doubt or at my lowest. To these handful, I love you guys. I just wanted you to know, that i've got your back, too. Despite that, there are the opposite. These people claim they're your friends and convince you that they can be trusted. But later stabs you in the back and shatters you. There are a few of you, whom i decline to mention and flame, but you know who you are. I've never forced anyone to be nice to me. I never did. If you wanted to be mean to me from the start, so be it. But don't hide your ulterior motives under the mask with sly smiles. Its just sickening. Remember, Karma can be such a biatch.

But thank god, despite all this mess, despite the shit and the crap, I've dearest Dinno to catch me when i fall and back me up. I love you to bits and pieces, baby. I love you. Every bit of you. We're meant to be. (: And sorry we had to spend our 18th monthsary at the hospital. I'll make it up to you, promise! ^^